


Leave Out All the Rest

by LadyofAvalon



Category: Provost's Dog - Tamora Pierce
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-12
Updated: 2012-06-12
Packaged: 2017-11-07 13:04:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/431502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyofAvalon/pseuds/LadyofAvalon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even when he thinks it's the end and he has no faith left in himself, Beka has faith in Rosto the Piper - more than he could have imagined.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Leave Out All the Rest

He was standing at the window, his face resolute and his arms crossed over his chest. Everyone else was happily chatting and catching up with the rest of their friends. Rosto the Piper seemed to be the odd man out purely by choice. His dark eyes were far away as he stared out the window at the street below.

Beka was watching him. He could feel her gaze on his back. Half of his mind was paying attention to his surroundings out of habit, but the rest of it was deep in thought. This was the end. There was no turning back. This was it.

Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He suppressed the urge to react, knowing that it was only her. He did not look at her. He could not bear to look into her blue eyes and see all that he so desperately wanted. Not now. Not yet.

"Rosto," she said softly. "Is something wrong?" Rosto did not respond immediately. His thoughts turned back to the parchment he held in his left hand.

"There's always something wrong," he replied cryptically. Beka looked at him for a long moment. His mouth twitched slightly. She knew he wanted to say something, but he did not speak. His stance alone was sign enough for her that something was very wrong. He was tense and more than a little jumpier than he usually was.

"You know what I mean, you looby," Beka retorted. "What's wrong?" Rosto look at her solemnly, raising a pale eyebrow ever so slightly.

"This is the end," he told her softly. "That's it."

Beka frowned. Obviously he was intent on being absolutely impossible and entirely cryptic. "I'm afraid I don't quite understand," she said. "You're going to have to be more specific."

In response, Rosto shoved the paper at her. "Here. Read it," he said. Beka paused for a moment, then took the paper from him. It was partially crumpled by his grip, but the strong handwriting was still easy to read.

It was a challenge. That was all. Nothing out of the ordinary. "What is this?" she asked softly, unsure what to make of it.

Rosto let out a sigh. "This is my death, Beka. I can't win this fight," he told her. "I'm a good fighter. One of the best. But he's better. He's unbeatable." Beka looked at him for a long moment in silence.

"You don't know that," she replied. "I've seen you fight, Rosto. I know how good you are with those knives of yours…" Rosto shook his head.

"I'm a fighter, Beka, but I can't stand up to the brute strength of someone like that. He's strong, he's clever, and he's fast…"

"But you are, too!" she protested. Rosto smiled faintly.

"I appreciate your vote of confidence, but while I may be all of those things, so is he," he told her. "There is no way I can beat him, even if I use dirty tricks," he added. "So that's it. This is the end."

Beka was silent for a long moment as she looked at him. She could not believe that he of all people – Rosto the Piper, the man who had brought down Kayfer Deerborn and helped her so much whenever he could – was just giving up like this. "Why, Rosto?" she asked. He met her gaze.

"Because that's how it's meant to be," he told her simply. "I always knew that this would happen someday."

"No, not that," she said. "Why are you just giving up? That's not the Rosto I know. The Rosto I know would never have given up like this…" He looked at her, then rolled his eyes.

"Beka, the man you knew – the man you thought you knew – never really existed. That is who I wanted to be. I wanted to be a good man, a just Rogue, but I never was. Not really," he said softly. "I've never truly been that person. I tried to be, but I'm not a good man, Beka Cooper. You always knew that. I'm a thief and a murderer. I've killed in self-defense and I've killed for other reasons. I've got more blood on my hands than you could ever know."

She watched him for a long moment. "That's not the Rosto I know either. That's not the Rosto any of us know," she told him. "You've done bad things, Rosto. I won't deny it. But you've only ever done what was necessary when everyone else was afraid to do it. You weren't afraid to be the one responsible when something needed to be done, no matter how bad it looked. You care about the people of the city and about your friends," she continued. "You're a better man thank you think you are. There's even a part of me that admires you for the strength that it takes to do what is necessary…"

Rosto looked at her skeptically. "You mean that?" he asked. Beka nodded.

"I do. There are times when we face a choice between what is right and what is necessary…not all of us could do what we had to in the situations you have been in," she replied. "I know I have not always been kind to you and that I've spurned your friendship and affection before, Rosto, but I do think you're a good man. You're not like the men my mother was with," she added. "You're better than they are. If we had been anything but the Terrier and the Rogue, we could have had something together…"

Rosto snorted, taking the paper back from her. "It's just the way you look at it, Beka. We're a lot alike, you and me. We do the same things. We care for the same people. The line between Rogue and Dog ain't that thick."

Beka shrugged. "Think what you will. Things have come between us. We both know it never would have worked for us to be together, Rosto."

He sighed as he looked at her. "Only because you didn't want it. I would have made it work, Beka. I would have done anything. I like you – I've never been anything but honest about that. I never really gave up hope on you," he said. "But things are too late now. Everything is too late now."

Beka let out a frustrated noise, shoving him lightly. "You don't listen, do you, you big looby!" she snapped. "Stop talking like you're going to die – you always have a chance to live. You have a chance to win, Rosto. All you have to do is try, ducknob," she added. Rosto smiled faintly at that, then shrugged.

"No one can really know," he admitted. "But there is no chance that I could win this duel." Beka sighed.

"Stop being stupid or you won't make it to the duel," she snapped. Rosto looked at her.

"I can't promise that. But you promise me one thing. Don't forget me," he said softly. "I don't want to die, Beka, but it's inevitable as the Rogue. It'll happen eventually. Just remember me. No matter what. Let me be remembered as you think I am rather than as just another Rat."

Beka was silent for a long moment. "Alright. But don't you dare lose this fight, Rosto the Piper, or none of us will ever forgive you," she replied. _I'll never forgive you. Not when we could have had it all. Just don't die today, Rosto. Just don't die…_


End file.
